cbox

♥ Florence, over-hyperactive. I (L) eating chocolates, and I'm a klutz,as well as a trouble-maker :D I'm fourteen, and July the 15th would be awesome. I love being cheeky and childish. That's the part of me that'll never grow up. I have a mind of a five-year-old and I love putting a smile on people's faces. So if you're down, I'm always here. Netball's my passion, and I'm loving it. I'm hoping for fairytales and miracles to happen ^^. I may be naive at times, but you can't cheat me. Currently attached with baby♥, and still counting on. I'm tremendously spontaneous and hyperactive most of the times. I love sweet things, they simply melt my heart. Equal Equation, L'ove.

I seem to be falling deeper into a dark hole,
never resurfacing.

2256 hours.
Back from Suntec, screw-ed up night.
The worst day of my life, in fact .
What does it feel like to not be listened to...
What does it feel like when there's no one there for you?...
What does it feel like being framed, when you did nothing wrong,
but people pressed on and on and think that you did do it?...
What does it feel like to be sitting in a corner alone, trying to figure out what you did wrong,
when actually you ain't at fault ?...
What does it feel like when after so many tears you've shed,
you found out that the thing was all a misunderstanding?...
What does it feel like to have a knife cut through your knife by another,
and after that they come cuddling you in their arms, telling you to forget it all ?...

This was how I felt all night.
Thought I could have enjoyed but...
I guess not.
To hell with it.
Taciturn .
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Do you remember when we fell in love,
we were young and innocent then.

0940 hours.
Its a Sunday today.
Probably going out with the whole family again.
Currently listening to Heartless by Kris Allen.
And I'm feeling so down now, I don't know why.
I've got nothing to post these days, yet I'm still spamming my blog with posts of eveyday life.
Its boring yeahhhhhhhh.
My phone's crazy, on and off working and not working.
I think I dropped it too many times.
And there's still months before I can change to a new phone.
Ah, waiting for nice and good phones to come out.
Tsktsk, its such a hard life.

Thinking of watching Chuck.
It is such a nice and funny show :D
Comedy rather, more then spying.
But its cooooool.

I neeeeeeed storybooks.
I've run out of books to read.
Shall buy or borrow them.
I've been having the motivation to study.
Ironic isn't it ?
Haaaaaaaahs, I'm gonna watch Chuck now.

Why am I feeling this way towards you .
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Give me one good reason ,
to continue fighting and not walk away.

I'll give today my dateline.
My last post probaby, unless I survive tomoro.
The parent-teacher conference.
Which I doubt I will survive the straining stuff of it.
Dang it, now I seem to be able to predict when everything's gonna end,
when everything will seem so dead.
I'm dying soon, inside out.
Screwed up inside out too.

...I feel so silly, because I cried today.
But of course, there is a reason behind it.
............. I shall end here.
With love,
Florence.

iloveyou.
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What if my chances are already gone,
I'm starting to believe that I could be wrong .

1835 hours.
Ugh, mark it. Today might be my saddest day ever.
Or perhaps tomorrow, or Friday.
......I feel like I'm torn into a million pieces right now.
And i don't know why.
School's boring nowadays, as there isn't much to do.
Just keep filing and corrections, filing and corrections.
The holidays are coming soon, and so is the Sec 2 camp.
Ah, I've got no mood for anything currently.
Dang it .
Alrights, short post.
I'm gonna go stress my brain cells out right now.
Oh, and Mr Nguyen, remember the deal we had?
Looks like you lost, nothing will be alright.
Haaaahs... so you owe me =)

I used to try not to think about the days we're seperated.
I always think of the days that we have and had together.
But now, seeing that i can predict and know the date of our seperation,
nothing seems right anymore.
I can't see any sense and logic in anything.
It seems like all's lost.
And everything is a searing pain cutting through me.
And when your love's lost, I'm blinded by all.

我是否应该放下这段情感呢？
我是否应该放你走，
就当作这是我爱你的方式。
放你走，让你开心，
不再会有犹豫，
也不再会有烦恼。
但是，如果放你走，
我能撑得了吗？
我能不顾我自己的情感就放你走吗？
这样，我不会上的更深呢?

算了,就当作这是我爱你的方式.
也就是我对你的牺牲.
i've
always
loved
you...

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Love is the language,
that every heart speaks .

1630 hours.
Second post of the day, boring.
Gonna go out later, which is a good thing :D
Haha, tagged to do this quiz by YuHeng ;

Q1. Who tagged you to do this quiz ?
Pffffft, I just said it. YuHeng.

Q2. Name some good points about him / her ?
She's nice & kind :D

Q3. Name some bad points about him / her ?
Haaaaaaaaaah, overly emotional.

♥♥♥

Q1. What class are you in ?
Hmms, 2E1.

Q2. Name all your best friends.
{ Huh, Head rush. } The cliques & some other ppl. ( Lazy to name larh, sorraye. )

Q3. Who is your favourite girl in class ?
I've got no favourite girl in class. Okay, I'll say, the whole lot of girls.

Q4. Who is your favourite guy in class ?
Pfffffft, guys are guys. All of them , take in the whole lot .

Q5. Are you attached or single ?
Status is a very touchy subject you know ! xD

Q6. Do you like this class ?
Obviously. They are the motivation for me to go to school.

Q7. What do you like about this class ?
Well , they have a great sense of humour, and a huge book of hornyness ;D

Q8. Why are you doing this quiz ?
Oh, I don't know. Trying to kill time ?

Q9. Do you believe in God ?
Yeah, in a way.

Q10. Girl or Boy ?
Girl obviously.

Q11. Do you have a crush on someone ?
Probably. Feelings are a touchy subject too you know.

Q12. Cried before ?
Oh, yeah. Cried till my eyes aren't left with any tears.

Q13. Do you prefer handphone or computer ?
I'd take both :D

Q14. Name those people you hate ?
Hatred is stupid, but I don't hate anyone except for the new school rule.

Q15. Do you prefer comedy or romance shows ?
Both. More to comedy though. It makes me laugh my ass off.

Q16. Have you smoked before ?
That'll be the last thing in my life I'd do.

Q17. When do you intend to get married ?
Haaaaaaaah, I don't know. There's no point, the world's ending anyway.

Q18. Nickname ?
Flower, Floor. Name it and you'll have it.

Q19. Last person you talked to ? ( excluding your family )
Well, that would be my maid.

Q20. Last person you messaged to ?
My brother.

Q21. Favourite Artist ?
Currently, that would be Taylor Swift.

Q22. Favourite song ?
Uncountable.

Q23. Nicest movie you've ever watched ?
Well, Twilight & Harry Potter perhaps. There's still lots more.

Q24. Favourite food ?
Is chocolate counted ? :D If its not, I eat anything thats edible & nice :D

Q25. Favourite drink ?
Oh, there's loads. Ribena, Ice Lemon Tea, Chocolate milkshake, etc :D

I'm not gonna tag anyone. If you wanna do it, just do it.

♥♥♥

Haaaaaah, I'm done with the quiz !
Its so exaggerating.
Probably going Suntec later, perhaps I can buy some stuff :D
Haahs, alrights, show's on.
Time to go.

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To me, to you,
there are no boundaries .

0905 hours .
Okay, my apologies, I forgot to post .

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JUSTIN !

Sorry sorry, it slipped my mind to post it .
Anyway, I still can wish you a belated birthday :D

Its a Sunday.
The weekends are coming to another end alr.
Soon, the next week will gone in a blink of an eye.
Haaaaaaaaaaah.
Probably going out today.
I wanna spend money larh !
Hahs, get dad to spend his money on me ! :D
Of course, he'll say yes to certain reasonable stuff.
Oh yes, why can't people just get over the fact that Kris Allen won?
The newspaper are always writing contradictions of him winning.
Anyway, whatever larh .

I'm still on about the stupid rule.
Its unreasonable, there's no logic in it.
Anyway, being mad about it doesn't help.
Seeing we're just children, we have to listen, ugh.

I'm afraid, very very afraid.
It's becoming another nightmare to me.
In my dreams and in reality.




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You'll make it through the pain ,
no matter the hurricanes .

1820 hours .
Its a Saturday ! Another weekend .
Currently listening to Crazier by Taylor Swift .
I'm bored, and well, emotional.
Haaaaaaaaaah, reminiscing some stuff.
Ah, tears are gonna well up soon if I leave my feelings like this.
Whatever, ugh.

Probably I said things too...easy today.
When thinking about the future, everything seems so dim.
My first lie, without blinking an eye.
It was a sunny day, summer air, start of a new year.
That day was the 29 April 2008, 0805 hours.
My teacher walked towards where I sat on the parade square,
and I looked up when she reached me.
Beckoning me to walk with her, I was scared.
Like I've did something wrong.
Of course, I immediately remembered the conversations between students and teachers.
The in-conversation.
We sat at exactly the small table and two chair seat near the exit of the canteen.
She started pulling out papers from her file.
I looked around, desperately trying to calm myself.
I was afraid of what she wanted to ask of course.
And I was giving myself choices whether I should say it all out.
But I was afraid, really afraid.
She started asking me about my family, my parents, my sibilings.
And random questions popped up.
She asked me about school, which subject I liked and hated the most.
Which subjects I could do the best in, which one I could not make through.
And then she started to ask about my love life.
She asked if anyone special had entered my life.
I panicked and gave a straight no.
I knew I had a mistake, by lying through my teeth.
She continued asking, curiosity got to me.
The P & T meeting, would she tell my parents if I told her the truth?
Of course, I knew every teacher would, and so I continued with the white lie.
I know, perhaps saying this might be a little too late, seeing that it's been bout a year now.
And perhaps apology won't help anymore.
But I'm still sorry. I know I've made a big mistake.
I know, you haven't liked me much since then.
I know, and I'm really sorry, really really sorry.
I won't do it again, if you asked, the truth is yours.
No matter what the consequence is...
My first lie, huh.
Ah, the tears are welling up.
Ugh, this is what happens when I reminisce.
Stupid stupid thing.

I still don't like the new rule.
Its stupid, I don't like it.
Whatever, like I can do anything about it .
Haaaaaaaaah, I'm listening to sad songs.
Which makes everything worse, but I can't help it.
Dad's playing the second version of Maple alr.
Sitting beside me, playing in bliss.
I sound so off right now.
Probably at night, everything would start all over.
Alright, I shall probably go off.
I won't pull through, I never will.

I said, you'll get through, you did it once, you can do it again.
But will I ?
I'm being incoherent now.
Did I really mean what I said?
I said it so easily, but will I ?
Let the pain fill me up,
and when it does, bleed from inside, the wound cutting against me.



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You lift my feet off the ground,
spin me around .


1825 hours .
Stupid stupid rule.
No offence, but I really don't like the new rule.
Or rather, no one likes it.
My mum even agreed that its a little overboard.
She said, if we must tie every single one of our hair up,
why not ask us to just take the tape and tape it to our heads?
Of course, she was a girl once, she would know.
I really don't like school now, in a way.
Because of the is stupid rule, and basically, there's nothing to do in class.
Except for corrections, which are tiring and freaking me out.
Its a Friday again.
How time flies. Soon, another half of the year would be gone.
June's coming, and netball trainings are resuming of course.
I think my stamina has decreased due to the amount of food I ate :D
Oh well, I've been exercising too, skipping ropes everyday ! Hahs.
I'm so bored, and tired. I wanna watch movies.
The stupid DvD player is spoiled now.
So only dad's room is available.
But he and mum always occupies it, ugh.
Speaking of which, I asked dad if I could go jogging tomoro at Bedok Reservoir Park.
And he said, why can't you jog around here?!
I was thinking of asking Mistika out to jog with me tomoro, as she's free.
And so I told him, but he said, ask your friend come here larhs.
Biased really, so I told him, well, he know I don't mean it in a way.
I was angry, and felt sorry at the same time.
But he let in at last, I think.

Currently listening to Kris Allen's No Boundaries on Youtube.
Oh yes, speaking of him, KRIS ALLEN WON AMERICAN IDOL ! :D
Haaaaaaah, everyone was betting on Adam Lambert.
But Kris won in the end, cooooooool.
Aw, the song's super nice, I'm gonna get it when its recorded and available online.
Oh yes, I forgot the most important thing.

MYE results was received yesterday.
I got four As, dang it.
I still lacked of 1 A to get my laptop.
Bloooooooooody hell ;D
Haaaaaah, but nevermind.
I shall try harder for the end of year exams.
Oh well, before the report book's out, I shall take my chances.
I did really bad for Maths this time round.
And really really well for all my Humanities this time.
Got A1s for the three Humanities subject ! :D
Haha, unbelievable huh. Nono, I studied !
I gotta get like 80 I think for Maths for the end year exam to get A for it in overall.
I'm gonna work harder though.
And achieve results that are well, out of my parent's expectations.
Dad was happy with my results, I think.
He said he was happy as I did quite well.
Mum's really happy too.
But I'm getting tuition for Math, as I didn't have before.
And my English dropped, so yeahhhhhhh.
As well as my Science I guess.

Oh, its such a long post already.
Life feels like a hurricane.
It comes and go.
Okay, that was a lousy example.

School today was awesome and hot !
Lessons were boring, there was simply nothing to do.
And the VP and DM walked around to check our hair.
Stupid stupid rule.
Ugh, I hate it so much.
We're the only school in Singapore who has this rule I guess.
No fringe for all girls ?
Not even the sides can be let down, ugh.
Well, some said maybe its because Mr Fathul is religious.
As in, he thinks that letting fringes down can attract the guy's attention.
Haaaaaaaah, funny.
But with us letting our fringe down, we're covering out faces, not showing it.
Ah, whatever. To hell with the stupid rule.
No one in school seems to comply though.
So thereeeeeeee.

Played netball after school today.
Twisting with Mistika.
Haaaaaaaah, after that slacked with Haziq, Rasyid, Bila and Mistika.
Talking about rules and regulations and so on.
Played truth or dare.
Haha, but mostly truth, everyone got asked like funny questions.
Ah, good times :D
After that, went home.
Super super tired ehs.

Still on about the rule.
I really don't like it.
How does fringes and outer looks helps with the impression of the school?
Isn't it with our character, manners and attitudes which makes first impression?
And we are a neighbourhood school, public complains are expected, isn't it?
Dad's enjoying my bitterness.
He keeps contradicting me in a way, though I know he disagrees, as he said before.
Sadistic rule, stupid stupid rule.
Curse it.
Really, curse it.
See some sense people.





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When it all shatters ,
my heart stays hollow .

1218 hours .
Okay, the words are dumb .
Haha, currently having fun contradicting Mr Nguyen .
We're talking lines , continuing after each other .
He's the proclaimed ' King of Crap' huh .
Anyway, I'm bored .
Just read books .
Dozens of books, skipping from here and there .
I alrdy know the details so there's no harm done .
I'm spamming my blog with posts when I'm bored .
I'm hungry, shall go hunt for food .
And I think I'm losing to Mr Nguyen .
Urgh .




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I'm still waiting for that solid sign to come ,
to let everything wash over me .


0915 hours .
Rise and Shine people .
Urgh, I'm rotting at home .
Why oh why must there be holidays .
Although there are benefits , but its boring .
Miserable more likely, and there's nothing to do .
One month of holiday , I wonder how I'm gonna survive that .
I'm already tired of playing the com alr .
Haaaaaaaah , perhaps I'll get over it .
There's still one week of school after this week, isn't there ?
I'm bored , tired & I need a break .
Swooooooosh , I wanna go out now .
I feel like a wild child , or maybe I am .
Mundane .

Wednesday.
I used to look forward to this day in school .
Netball training , the lessons .
Haaaaaaaah .
I need to lost weight .
I haven't been exercising lately .
Oh well , I was hoping training would resume soon .
What more is there to do besides going out , during the holidays ?
Training .

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Perhaps it isn't good resisting ,
cause everything might be at loss .

1830 hours .
Oh yes , I forgot to say this :
HAPPY FIRST MONTH TO YUHENG & MANDRIC !!
Hahas, hope you guys enjoy your trip out today .
The beach ehs , romantic .
Hahaaaaa .
Sorry , anyway , last long !!

Nay , I've spent this day meaningfully .
I read for the whole afternoon .
Whole three hours sitting there reading .
I was so into the story that I lost track of time .
After that , wrote some stuff , doodled while listening to music .
And came here to post then .
Mundane, really .
Oh , the cliques should be having fun now .
I sort of regret and not regret spending the day out .
Well , its a hot day , but it could be fun with them around .

Aw , cool , there's crab for dinner today .
Swoooooosh , I keep thinking about my marks for subjects .
Fiona's gotten back hers .
I wonder how mine would differ .
Haaaaaah , alright .
Time to go , later .

I didn't know .



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If I put on this mask ,
how long will it put off ?


2140 hours .
Its been exactly 3 hours and 28 minutes since I last blogged .
Ah well , I've got simply nothing to do aites .
Haaaaaaah , feeling much better now .
Basically because I'm not thinking about anything currently .
Listening to soothing music , actually its rock .
Miley Cyrus's Hoedown Throwdown again .
Was listening for a short moment to Muttons to Midnight .
Haha , they were commenting about Man U again .
They are big time Man U fans .
Ah, I guess they're getting the cup this year , face it .
I'm having some sort of rashes again .
What the hell .
My legs are like itchy .
Ugh , can't stand it , so i sort of put ice on it .
Haaaaah , while watching Reaper Season Two .
Nay , I finished the latest episodes of Gossip Girl , Reaper & Heroes alrdy .
Haaaaaah , so while waiting for new ones to come out , I shall watch Chuck .
Probably starting from tomoro .
Or I might watch Dexter , or Paul Blart Cop Mall .
Ah , I'll have the time in the world .
Though I have to do light studying from time to time .
Who knows for what .
Songs songs songs !
I need new songs .
Burnnnnnnnnnnnnnn .
I feel like running tomoro .
Yeahhhhhhh , probably I will , if my legs are feeling better .
I'm waiting for movies .

Hannah Montana movie ; 040609
Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince ; 170709
New Moon ; 201109

Ah , the Hannah Montana movie , is not a confirm .
Might watch it to kill my time if I might ;D
Hahs, I'm bored .
Off to play online games .

I'm sorry .




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This calming lullaby ,
makes me want to cry .

Good morning people { ! }
Haaaaaaaaaah , sorry, random .
Listening to some really nice and calming lullaby currently .
Its getting and rubbing on me , really .
Ah , yesterday night's dinner at home ,
chatted upon a topic .
We were watching Ripley's Believe It Or Not .
Though my mind was somewhere else .
I was thinking what would life be without goals .
And how much our family didn't have any goals or plans .
Dad just goes according to his heart .
And there he stands, successful as ever today .
I was thinking and comparing how different our lives were from people .
Trying to figure out whether it was a good or bad thing .
Ugh , Dad could see through my thinking face ,
and den he asked me what's wrong .
So I said, our family always doesn't have any goals ,
doesn't plan our next step everytime, we just go according to our hearts .
For example, if we're going out tomoro, we've got nothing fun to play .
We'll just slack around and shop at a place we could have gone a hundred times .
So yeahhhhhhh .
And aft that I said , we never really do anything adventurous .
Like climbing the Bukit Timah Hill , going for picnics by the beach .
And I haven't been to Sentosa since I was five .
Hahs .
Dad was thinking den , but den I had to think back on their working hours .
They woke up at 1am everyday and work till noon just to support this family .
So there, so I just said nevermind, I was just saying .
And then dad said , we could do more things .
But I said I didn't want to tire him out .
So the topic ended .
I think I was kind of venting or something .
Well , and was sort of being selfish when I didn't think on the behalf of them .

Ah , I miss my childhood days .
I still remember how every afternoon ,
after finishing my revision , I would run out and play with the kids next door .
How every evening dad would bring us down to the void deck to play badminton .
How every evening mum would bring me to jogging together with her,
and dad would sneak out after us later to surprise us .
How dad and I used to sneak out using our bikes to Hougang Green before dinner ,
to eat Long John's Silver .
How dad and I used to race along the tracks to see who won .
How all I ever had and thought was happy memories .
Now , they're all no longer there .
I used to remember watching Cinderella .
And wishing that when I grew up , I would live in a castle .
With pretty dresses to wear everyday, and one day ,
my prince charming would come .
Hahs... I guess, a girl can dream huh .

Well, enough of the memories .
People age , people grow .
Times are different .
Haaaaaaahs .
Its a Sunday .
Probably going out today .
No idea where we're going like usual .
So I'll just wait till its time to go .
I shall study Chinese after one episode of Reaper ! :D

Thinking so much , but nothing comes to conclusion .
12 more days ...
Give me a break ..

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Just hold on , hold on .

Haaaaaaah , HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY FIONA ! ♥
Its my present to her ;D
Its so freakingggggggggg cute .
And it cost me 20 bucks !

Its 9 in the morning .
And I'm already at the com .
Sorry for the lack of posts, have been busy relatively .
Been watching Heroes, Season Four and Five .
Yesterday finished the whole Volume Four alr .
Ah , disastrous fate . Sad case for them .
The world's coming to an end .
History paper down yesterday !
One LAST paper to go !
And its Mother Tongue , the not-so-favourite subject .
History was easy :D
Haaaaaahs, confident :D
& I think I'm so crazy about Twilight .
I don't even read or watch the movies these days .
But I've been having dreams about it .
What the hell , must be going mad alr .
Alrights, I'm going off to watch Gossip Girl :D
Byeeeeeeeeee !

Lost , loss .
I lost , you won .


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The guilt in your voice gave you away ,
asking me to stay away .

Hohos, Literature paper .
Hmms , it was okay , I think it was easy though .
Hahs, my hopes are highhhhhh .
Ah, short post .
Gotta run for History .
I haven't eaten lunch , hungry to the maxxxxxx .
Ugh , bored .
History's tomoro .
And then Chinese on Monday .
Tsktskkkkkk .
Alrights, off I go .
Byeeeeeeeeeee :D

Of course, I remember .
I'm not so sure anymore .

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Pretend all you want ,

*Swooooooooosh* , Geography paper !
It was... well , easy to me I guess .
Not hard , not really all the way smooooooth , so about average .
Hmms, hard to say actually .
I've lost a tragic 10 marks .
To blame that stupid clock , I should have brought a watch .
The clock stopped at 10 mins before the paper ended .
And I'm left with two questions .
So i took my time to write .
I din't know the clock stopped .
And it was really left with 10 mins plus plus .
But the teacher realised the clock stopped, and she said we're left with 5 mins .
What the hell .
I panicked, and forgot everything in the short period of time .
And as I wrote , the answers came rushing to my mind again .
Ugh, but the time is alr left with 2 mins alr .
My four mark question , I named the four impacts, but didn't elaborate .
The six mark question, I tried to write as fast as I could, as I knew the answers .
Bloooooooody hell , hahs .
Sorraye .
Well , maybe I could get half of the marks or more , haaaah .
Literature and listening compre tomoro .
Literature, wah , lazyyyyy .
I'm really lazy to touch the books .
I kept thinking it's History tomoro .
I don't know why I've suddenly got a liking for History .
I find it interesting, and can't wait for the exam .
Haaaaaaaaahs .

My dilemma's gone...
I guess, but now, problems come and go aites .
Another one is probably coming , so yeahhhhhhh .
Pfffffffft, oh well .
Suck it, this is life .
My dad always say , " Being a human being, is alrdy very hard . Why make things more difficult ?"
Mmm... Parents reached home alr .
Great, accompanience :D
Rightttttt , I'm going offffff .
Byeeeeeee ;D

I don't know why .
Its a mystery .



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I need all the time in the world ,
find the cure to my pain .


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All of our tears and pain ,
would be lost in the rain .

I just had a nightmare .
Well , I consider it a nightmare .
Because surrounding me was all my family members ,
but they ignored me like I was invinsible .
And I was all alone .
Haaaaaahs, I must have been crying too much at night ,
that's probably why .
Going down to the market later , find my parents .
I'm gonna cut my hair .
It's so thick and heavy .
Mum asked me yesterday ,
' My dear , isn't your hair heavy ? Wanna cut anot ? '
Then I was like okay .
Haaaaaahs, she seems so nice nice nice ! :D
Since Mother's Day .
She seems very very happy with the handbag and the rest of the accessories she received .
Heeeeeees , she's really happy I guess =)
That's a good thing .
I'm been studying .
HARD .
Studying from Geog to History .
Den History to Chinese .
Never really studied Literature .
Didn't know what to study cause there's no topic for it .
Except for that "Kevin" passage .
Mmm... I feel so weak .
Not physically though .
Ahhhhhh , moronic .

Alrights, I guess I shall go off .
Wanna study a little before I leave the house ;D


I feel like I don't belong .
I feel so afraid .
That one day , when its found out , the outcome would be so hurting .
I'm so afraid, that it has become my nightmare every night .
I've been having sleepless nights , all because of it .
But I really don't know what to do ...
I'm lost , and I'm confused .
I don't want to cause another disaster .
The last day of school...
Would it really be revealed ?
I'm so afraid...
I've been feeling guilty since the start .
But no one seems to understand , my dilemma .
Why, does everything have to be this way .
I look at Crystal's sibilings,
all able to keep her secret for her .
How I wish it were the same for mine .
But I guess this is fate .
But what am I supposed to do .
Everyone would be hurt .
I don't want this to end in tears once again .
And I would find myself shrouding in the darkness again .
Guilt washed over me, wondering how many people I;ve hurt ...
Even though I've hurt myself too ... but I've never thought for my own .
I don't want to remember the pain that had claimed me last year .
But it seems like history is going to repeat itself .
I guess , this is where I stand .
All shall end in tears , once again .



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Flushing red on your cheeks ,
I'm gonna miss that blush .

HELLO ! :D
Haaaaaaahs, I'm feeling much much better .
Well, not really .
When there's something really wrong, I go super high to get things off my head .
So yeahhhhhh, today's the day .
I went so hyper- active, till I was scolded crazy .
Went to buffet today, with Crystal's family .
The bill was over $1000 man !?
For 10 people .
Haaaaaahs, but well, we had lobster, shark fin's , bird's nest .
So, not surprising .
Dad seems pretty satisfied in fact .
Haaaaaaahs, I'm bored .
I just played with my mum .
Argumentative, actually .
Haha, and in the end, I got so crazy , she shouted for my dad to help .
But he was bathing, so yeah ...
Haha, and she said she would probably send me to IMH .
But I live beside it , that's the advantage ;D
Hmms, mum's high too I guess .
Hahas, ohmygosh, went bonkers when I saw Crystal just now .
Haha, and Websterrrrrrrr ! <3
And of course, Oxford and Charlene !
I kept disturbing Webster .
He's so funny man :D
Heeeeees, potential joker !
Haha, chey .
I made everyone laughed okays !
Because I was fooling around like a crazy ass .
Haha, and I also made the waiter laugh !
Though he was trying not to show it, but after that he can't control ,
and started shaking and laughing like hell .
I think the whole restaurant was our voices lorhs .
Hahaaaa, but we're probably the biggest table and the most expensive one I guess ?
Heeeeees, Webster and his mum was talking about girls .
HAHA , Webster was looking in my direction and saying how evil girls were .
As there's one particular case, where a girl cheated a guy of his money .
Haaaaaaahs, den his mum said to him,
that he should probably find girls who are not so clever,
and a little mental .
And I was like ?!?!!?!@
And I asked, you talking about me arhs ?
Haha, den everyone was laughing, den his mum said,
Eh, yeah horh, fits !
Haaaaahs, ass, say I not so clever .
Bleahs, well, can't blame .
Webster's in ACS .
Hahs, and well, he said he's my twin .
So I have to play along with him =)
Ah, and we were talking about Jeremy .
And then I said he was super cute , and they laughed again .
I think I have some power over my words man,
Dad was looking at me like I've lost my mind in all .
Haaaaaahs .
After that, we seperated .
They had to go home , as Oxford had tuition .
Fiona, me and parents went to Vivo City .
Get Kenny's new phone card as he lost his phone .
Sad case .
And then returned the television box, after walked around,
parents went to the coffee house to drink coffee, and we came home .
Heeeeees, bought chocolates <3
Gonna eat them .
Alrights, shall go off alr .
Byeeeeeeeeeee ;D

I think I'm really turning away ...
So are you .
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Deprived ,

I feel so ass-ed up .
Sorry for my uncouth language .
But really , everything's so ...
frustrating .
Dang it , I'm deprived from it .
Oh yes, Mistika's the IQ girl .
Haaaaah, testing me with all her chim up words .
It's Mother's Day today .
And I long long alr bought a present .
But now, Kenny just asked me if I still wanna fork out money ,
to pool in with them for a four hundred dollars handbag .
Pffffffffft , I'm going to be broke soon .
Considering if I should pool in .
Seeing that after I pool in, I'll be totally broke-d .
And I mean it seriously , so yeahhhhhh .
And I wouldn't have extra savings for other's presents anymore .
Dad's temperamental .
Feel so offfffff right now .
Haaaaaahs, currently listening to Uptown Girl by Westlife .
Cooooool , reminisces old memories .
Ah , going out for celebration alr :D
I'm offffffffff .

Imissyou .


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I want this to end ,
let the pain subside .

Its a Sundayyyyyy .
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY ! ♥
to all the mothers around the world =)
Hope you all enjoy today .
Hmms... probably celebrating it today .
Eating buffet again, gosh, I'm gaining weight .
& without netball trainings now, stamina should dying way deep .
We, as kids, should thank our mothers today .
Haaaah, so we should be thanking her for all the past years stuff .
Zzz, crapping .
Sorraye , but I mean it .

I'm still feeling down .
Not in the mood for anything .
Ugh , I can't seem to cheer up no matter what .
What the hell is wrong, dang it .
I'm screaming inside, and the scream is trying to get out .
Tried screaming into my pillow, but it can't seem to work .
Haaaaah, silly silly girl .
Alrights, I shall end here .
Off to prepare my mum's present, and I shall do a little bit of revising .
Been watching HanaKimi again these days .
Reminisce some old memories...
Hmms, alrights .
Later .

OF course, I don't know what to do once again .
I want this to end .





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Of all the times ,
I feel so scr-ewed .
How i wish I can save you, and myself, from all this misery ...
Why can't i seem to see where you're coming from ?...
I'm in a dilemma .
Disastrous .
Blasphemy .


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Procrastinations ,
& I seem to be turning away .

Its a Saturday !
Hahs, Happy Vesak Day .
Though I have no idea what its for .
Slept in late today, just woke up at about 15 mins ago .
Haaaaah, I'm bored .
And I don't feel like studying ...
Tsktsk, I really seem to have lost my motivation of studying .
Not going out this weekend, it seems .
Dad told me to guide Fiona as much as possible .
Because she has her English Paper 2 on Tuesday .
And her English can die larh, he said .
But she's not that bad .
Anyways, I wanna go out !
Thought of seeing Crystal this coming Monday as its a holiday,
but Dad said it wasn't the right time .
Aites, so I'll have to wait till after the exams den ...

I feel ... down .
I think that should be partly the correct word .
Why oh why ...
Hahs, I feel so idiotic .
Perhaps dumb .
Well, no denying that, but I've always been .
Hmms... I probably should be enjoying my life now .
Instead, I'm sitting about and thinking about where my life went wrong .
Practically, wasting my time .
Humphs .
Alrights , I need to go guide Fiona alr .
Haaaaah, and yes !
I'm going to spoil myself tomoro !
I'm gonna buy new stuff for myself, to cheer me up =)
Hahs, have a urge to spend all the money I've saved, apparently .
Heees, alrights .
Byeeeeee :D

Apologies can't seem to help .
I seem to be turning away , and I don't know why ...




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Blasphemy,
I seem to be turning away .

HELLO ! :D
Swooooosh, science paper was *breeeeeeeeeze* .
Haha, literally .
I think I did my best, and that I think I can get pretty well marks .
Actually, I got shocked at the starting of the paper today .
Cause I practically forgot everything at the start of the paper ,
But after doing awhile, they started flooding my brain .
Skipped around the paper, from the front, skipped to the back .
Then the back, skipped to the middle, den back to the front .
Haaaaaah, Amelia & Amanda was puzzled by what I was doing again .
Haaaaaaah .
It's a hot day todaye .
Its like the weather is having mood swings .
One moment, its hot .
Then it suddenly rains, and after that hot again .
Hahs, hmms, I seem to be waiting for something ...
Tsktsk, thought today would be a all day happy and *breeeeeezy* day ,
but perhaps some parts of the day pulled me down .
Ugh, practically overall, its still okay :D

I lost my motivation of studying .
And I know it seems ironic, but I'm starting to grow on Math and History .
Haha, the used-to-be most tiring and hard subjects to me .
But now, they seem to be... hahs, swoooooooooosh .
WOW , haha .
Something must have made me like this .
Probably the weather's getting into my head .
I somehow hope that the exams would finish faster, but at the same time,
hope that the exams would end slower in a way, ( cause I'm dreading to know my fate ) /
and also ( I'm dreading for things and for my time to be limited again... )
Haha .
Alrights, gotta go off alr .
Having dinner, dad's calling .
Byeeeeee :D

080509 <3
I wonder how long this could last .
Thanks for everything ;D

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Limited time, & these limits are driving me crazy .

Two papers down, and about six more to go, I think .
I forgot how many more papers there are, to end this disaster .
I'm tired, really tired .
And my knee's hurting again, along with my stomach .
I feel so weak nowadays, aching everywhere .
Here and there, here and there, its like something is wrong with me .
Haaaaaah, maybe I'm diagnosed with a random disease, who knows .
Perhaps I'll die earlier den expected . - -

Maths paper today was...( i'm speechless ) .
Paper One was sort of the more pulling up of marks paper .
Paper Two was well, hard, I guess .
Nevermind, shall not think about it .
Must be optimistic and look on the positive side .
If my calculator was alive, it would be mad at me .
Cause I kept punching numbers into it over and over again .
Haaaaaaah, Amanda, Amelia, and everyone else came to ask me if I was okay,
cause I kept punching numbers into the calculator .
Hilarious :D

English on Wednesday was okay .
I think that I might be able to do well .
It wasn't that bad as I thought it would be I guess .
Science's tomoro, and I should be mugging for it, I guess .
But its quite early now, and I'm still feeling uncomfortable,
so I guess, after taking a nap den I'll study all the way .
Its going to be 2 soon .
Parents are gonna go and enjoy themself .
I'm the only child at home .
The rest of the peeps are not back yet .
Sadddddd, haha, at least I'll have some peace though .

I seem to be waiting for something unexpectant .
I'm relatively happy with myself currently, hahs .
Because of the load of work I'm able to complete and do these days .
Awesomeeeeeeee ! :D
Haha .
Alrights, I shall go off .
Bye peeeeeeeeps :D

200 days...
Its long isn't it ?
I used the calculator today,
and found the equation .
I'm left with 83 days .



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We could leave this town, and run forever .

Pictures posted as promised :D
Haha, accomplished that !
And I managed to liven up my blog with pictures !
I just revised / studied Math .
I didn't know what to study , and of all subjects I chose Math .
Can you believe it ?!

Went to Plaza Hotel yesterday .
It was sort of a last minute thing .
Because I was wearing my new dress .
And dad was like "Whoa , where are you going ?"
And I said, " I have to dress up right ?! "
And it was reasonable, so he found no sense to argue anymore .
So in the end, headed to Plaza Hotel .
The food had, sadly dropped its standard .
The dinner cost about $300 ( rounded up) .
Before we left, something super fun happened .
I suddenly missed something , so I just played with Dad .
Played with him Pepsi Cola, and he joined willingly !
Ah, haha, it was hilarious .
Our whole family stop eating just to watch two of us play !
I said if I won, he owed me a new bag, and if I get 5As, he'll get me a laptop .
He said Deal .
So we started .
I won the first four rounds, but at the last round, he started his "turbo" .
He won me for the next four rounds .
And it was down to the last one .
The atmosphere was really tense , and den we started .
He cheated by using two fingers to nail my thumb down !
Hahs, but nevermind, i let him win .
Cause I know that he would get me those stuff I wanted some other day :D
Haha, den he played with my brothers, it got so hilarious <3
I love yesterday man !

School was okay today .
I felt so ... hmms, out of place .
Uncomfortable and all .
But anyway, it'll pass .
Haven't totally recovered, still having sore throat and flu .
Went to the doctor just now , nothing much .
Heees, I guess things would get better .
Alrights, dinner's ready .
Got to go , byeeeeeee :D

I hope I could just know what's bothering you,
cheer up...

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Forever and always , fairytales aren't real .


I finished Breaking Dawn .
Haaaaaah, its awesome !
Well, practically, everything comes down to a happy ending .
Wished it could be the same for life .
Woooow .
Haha,alrights .
Going out today after all .
Going off already .
Parents are back :D
Hahs, byeeeeee !


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Tell me something reliable ,
cause I never know which day I would fall .

Heyyyyyyy :D
Its a Sunday, and the last day for me to post .
Before the exams starts officially .
Before I stop slacking .
Before I start hoping that they would end quickly and wonderfully .
Before I start dreading the last day of school .
Before I start wondering how soon it would be for me to fall .
Haaaaaaah, silly girl .
Don't know if I'll be going out today .
Dad's unsure .
He's deliberating .
Heees, been reading Breaking Dawn .
Tempted by Kenny, he brought the book back !
I wanted to buy it after exams so as not to distract myself .
But now, I fell for it .
Nevermind, I was going to finish the book already anyway .
Hmms... been revising .
Wasn't that hard .
Hah, thought it would be a toil .
I'm feeling better .
The fever has subsided but I'm left with sore throat .
Mum says its because of the hot sun that day .
Heeeeeees :D
Alrights, there's typically nothing to post about .
Nothing interesting from a person like me :D
I shall go off and read Breaking Dawn.
Revising and mug in the afternoon !
Later peeps =)

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